Top 5 Shows

1) I got this dispatch about Milwaukee from area drummer Jordan Richardson while he was drumming in Quaker City Nighthawks on the band’s recent Heartlandia tour; they had played two nights at this one bar there, which meant they’d had a good day or so to hang in the city where Kato Kaelin comes from. “It’s really like Laverne and Shirley here” read one of his texts, the rest of which described how a lot of the scenery is kinda funny and people from Milwaukee are fucking goofballs, and how it totally made sense that our buddy Myles was from there. Technically, Myles is from a nearby town called Mequon, but he is indeed a fucking goofball.

I bring this up because there’s a band from Milwaukee playing Thursday night at 1912 Club called the Platinum Boys, and they look and sound like they’re fucking goofballs, too. Not in the way Myles is (at one point in college, he and I were supposed to go to this “snappy casual” sorority mixer and I had to break it to him that he probably couldn’t wear a backpack strap for a belt to the thing, nor Teva’s), but more in a drink-twelve-beers-and-drop-different-types-of-trash-into-a-woodchipper sort of way. At least that’s what I would want to see happening to this music. What I read about the band describes Platinum Boys as power-pop, so if you’re a fan of Diarrhea Planet or the Jacuzzi Boys, think of this band as Planet Jacuzzi (or Diarrhea Boys, I guess); I think it sort of sounds like some good musicians trying to play songs sloppier than KISS does when they are trying about 78%. Either that, or the house show-band equivalent of Def Leppard. Maybe I’m just projecting a band I’d like to be in on them? In any case, their songs are about beer and drugs and chasing the muff around, so needless to say I’ve been smoking weed the whole time I’ve been listening. New Jersey hard rock outfit Liquor Store play before them, (I think this is a return visit to FTW for them, in fact), with local support from handclap-emoji-wave band Fungi Girls, veteran punk ’n rollers Oddlot, and a Denton garage rock band called Don Henley is Local Music From Denton (just kidding – they’re called Bad Beats). Don’t forget that 1912 Club is cash only. BTW, if the above description of Platinum Boys doesn’t make a lick of sense to you, this video is along the lines of what I was trying to get across:

2) Did you read that whole thing? This one is shorter, I promise. Also on Thursday: Pale Dīan headlines Lola’s, with Ill Smiths in the 11pm spot, and a band called Honor System kicking the night off. Apparently this is the last time Ill Smiths will be playing under that name; afterward, you’re supposed to call them VVoes, which is pronounced “whoas.” I gotta tell you, band formerly known as Ill Smiths, you are a good band who had a perfectly good name; now you have a gimmicky one, and after time, you’ll probably regret it, too. To be honest, I am already annoyed by typing it, nearly as much as I am having to search MS Word’s symbol selection for a lowercase “i” with a fucking macron in order to properly spell the name of a band pronounced Pale Diane. I’m not saying you have to cater to the people who cover local music with easy-to-type band names, but seriously, why do people have to be so goddamn cute? It’s just a minor hassle that makes my eyes sore from rolling them. And as for you VVoes guys, when look at the double-Vs you’ve typed in your Facebook invites or bio or wherever, do you look back and go, “Dudes, those double capital Vs are so tight!” Maybe you do; I guess I don’t know what’s cool with typography nowadays. One last question: did Honor System also formerly go by something else? Because “bands who used to be called something else” would be a funny accidental theme for this bill. Ah crap. That did end up going long! Be that as it may, my frustration with bands’ naming choices is pretty immaterial; I enjoy both Pale Dīan’s music as well as Ill Smiths, and this bill will not disappoint. This is a promo clip from when they changed their name a few months ago. Nicely ominous!

3) Hey, speaking of Diarrhea Planet (mentioned up there in spot numeo uno), the Nashville pop punk band are the (hahaha wait for it) number two headliner at Parade of Flesh’s annual Chrismukkah party at Club Dada in Dallas on Friday night. Music City psych duo JEFF the Brotherhood are the main act, and the 10, 9, and 8pm slots are filled with Dallas surf-wave band Sealion, Fort Worth drunk-wave band War Party, and Portland, Oregon’s Psychomagic. The beer, reverb, and jokes will flow like wine at a bill that’s fun from start to finish. This War Party video remains one of my all-time local faves:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zddw66-g5aA

4) Friday’s best bet here in Cowtown is at Shipping and Receiving, where Dallas’ Dead Mockingbirds headline a show with Denton’s ABACABA, Jesse Gage, and Christian Medrano of area pop-punk group Hate Your Friends. I don’t think I’ve used the word eclectic to describe a show, but that’s what this bill is. Dead Mockingbirds will remind you of the Strokes at some point, but I think of them as more of a hard rock band masquerading as garage rock. ABACABA is crewed mostly by members of Pearl Earl, and sonically, they share some dream-DNA with their sister band, but it’s a little weirder, though to me, it sounds a lot more synth-pop-oriented. Jesse Gage, who is releasing a CD Friday night as well, is a multi-instrumentalist whose songs sound like they’re in the wheelhouse of Modest Mouse fans, while Christian Medrano’s solo material is probably reflective of a wide range of songwriters, but also firmly influenced by a lot of punk rock. There’s an appearance of SEGA’s Outrun in this Dead Mockingbirds video, btw; it makes me exceedingly happy:

5) Fred’s is getting rowdy again on Saturday night, this time with The Beaumonts, the Me-Thinks, and Vincent Neil Emerson. Tearing the Haltom City fuzz-rockers out of the inner sanctum of their Marshall Amplifier Temple and sandwiching them between an up-and-coming hard luck troubadour and Lubbock’s rowdiest honky tonk band might sound like a weird idea, but I am confident they will all turn Fred’s into a loud, drunken party. The free show lights up at 8pm. This Beaumonts jam makes fun of Red Dirt music: