Last week, I joined the rest of civilized feminine society when I got a HydraFacial treatment.
A HydraFacial is not your mama’s homemade egg-white facial mask. It’s a high-tech, medical-grade facial treatment that I decided I needed recently at 29 weeks pregnant, when my skin was not glowing, not in the slightest.
For weeks, I have been oiling and peeling like a middle-school boy. Apparently, my unborn son needs extra androgens to incubate into the tiny He-Man he’ll become, and this is raking hell across my complexion. On the upside, I could probably hand carve my own Mt. Rushmore with the strength of my fingernails.
Up until now, my skincare routine consisted of water and soap. Imagine how clueless I felt when I had to start trying all these drugstore facial cleansers and essential oils, and when I paid way too much to have an Aveda Master Aesthetician tell me another $200 in essential oils should alleviate my problem. (It didn’t.)
At the bottom of a pit of vanity and desperation, I walked into the swanky chic lobby of Magnolia Ave MedSpa, makeup-less and mortified. The consultant who was going to overhaul my face, Berenice, probably saw me as a welcome challenge. We chitchatted pleasantly while ambling back to the HydraFacial suite, where I reclined in a chair so pristinely white that I was afraid to sit in it with shoes on. However, I was so drawn to the cerulean blue glow of the machine that held all the super serums that would resurface my cheeks, chin, and T-zone that I forgot to care about the chair.
Berenice answered every one of my 30 or so nerdy questions about the “vortex” tip of the HydraFacial pen, which is like a mini vacuum. She began by exfoliating dead cells that would be in the way of the GlySal peel in Step 2. Surprisingly, the peel isn’t as painful as it sounds. Some clients feel a subtle burning sensation. I, for one, felt nothing more than a scratchiness, a sensation akin to soft velcro smothering my skin in gentle circles. Berenice assured me that the GlySal was the worst pain I’d feel for the rest of the treatment, which is good considering I did not read up on Steps 3 through 5 in this process.
The next “extraction” step was by far my favorite phase of “Mission Skin Control,” when the vortex suctioned my pores. Yes, I was blissfully bewildered by this suctioning, and I started to think really hard about whether I could afford my own HydraFacial machine. (Newsflash: Google tells me I will never be able to afford this fancy equipment.) Then our treatment wound down with hydrating serums that made my skin so soft it was hard not to touch the finished product.
When I sat up, Berenice showed me the container of liquid waste she’d sloughed off of me. The proof was in that puddle of dead skin cells, I guess. She explained that the results should last five to seven days and that I could put on my makeup that night, no redness or irritation. Hallelujah.
A few days later, I’m still trying not to touch the silky, supple skin Berenice excavated so well, and I’m planning to return this Saturday between 4 and 8pm, when Magnolia Ave MedSpa hosts an open house soirée of skin consultations, live music, light bites, and a silent auction benefiting SafeHaven of Tarrant County, a women’s and children’s shelter. Berenice said there’s a HydraFacial treatment up for grabs, so I will be there like a bridesmaid scratching for a bouquet.
Magnolia Ave MedSpa, 1309 Washington Ave, Fort Worth,TX 76104
