This week I’m practicing with my camera to learn how to download photos, size them, jpeg ’em, and post them onto Blotch.
This prompted reader Lucky Pierre to suggest I go to the Stock Show.
I aim to please.
The first guy I ran into was Sam McClure, who was grooming a llama named Tax Man (the critter was born on April 15).
McClure is a talkative sort and within minutes I knew more about llama feces than I ever imagined.
“They’re poop doesn’t smell,” McClure said. (My ex-girlfriend used to say the same thing about me).
Seems llamas have a three-panel stomach that does an extra good job of breaking down food into a pile of poop so lovely and fragrant that you damn near want to roll around in it.
“And it’s great fertilizer,” he said.
A nearby barn was filled with cows, including Anela, a pretty little thing with furry ears and deep, searching eyes (her eyes mainly seemed to search for a deep pile of hay).
Kelly Salyer, an 11-year-old from Wharton TX, is Anela’s keeper or master or whatever you call it. She said Anela is a braunvieh.
“What’s a braunvieh?” I asked.
An older girl standing next to Salyer sighed and, somewhat dismissively, said, “It’s the oldest pure breed ever.”
Well excuuuuuse me for not knowing my cow breeds. I have a life.
Next I ran into Fort Worth’s most recognizable millionaire Ed Bass, looking dapper in his Western-tinged but still contemporary outfit. He was walking west when I ran into him.
“Hello, Mr. Bass, can I take your photo?”
“Sure, you bet, glad to,” he said.
After I took the photo, he shook my hand then started walking east. That’s odd, I thought to myself, did he forget which direction he was going? Sure enough, after a few paces he spun around and headed back in a westerly direction.
The Bass breed is native to Fort Worth, believed to have come from the crossing of a buffalo and a pumpjack.
Thanks Jeff.